The Minnesota Masonic Charities have been a platinum sponsor of Say Yes to No from the beginning. Their support has put hundreds of No books and Say Yes to No materials in the hands of parents all over the state. This active support has led to overwhelming turnout of parents and ongoing book reads and conversations.

Winona School District is one example where Paul Durand, Superintendent, Winona Area Public Schools, Lori Ortega and Clarence Russell, Winona Masonic Lodge (featured in picture) joined forces to support the parents and educators in their school district with a hugely successful kickoff event and follow-up Say Yes to No book reads and conversations.

 

Last Friday, the Masons again expressed support as I was invited to speak at their annual conference in Duluth. Over 400 Masons gathered from all over Minnesota and heard the Say Yes to No message with enthusiasm.  hank you again to the Masons.

Do you have a Say Yes to No story?  Please share it by posting a comment.

There’s still snowy weather in the Northland, but that didn’t stop over 200 parents and educators from showing up at Richfield High School last night to hear a presentation on No.

One group of moms was particularly there on a mission. The LAATE CLUB (Ladies Assisting Adolescents Till Evolution) from SW Minneapolis, having read Why Do They Act That Way? A Survival Guide to the Adolescent Brain For You and Your Teen, were interested in No parenting strategies for teens.

This group is a great example of parents supporting one another through the ups and downs of adolescence, helping their kids (and themselves) manage the teen years with a minimum of bumps and bruises. Parenting in an age of More, Fast, Easy, and Fun isn’t easy.

Who do you rely on for parenting support?  A friend, a group?

Help another parent, share your story.

With the economic news swirling from dire predictions to dire realities, our schools and kids need parent and community support more than ever before. The business community has been dealing with the global market place for a while, and now our kids are going to have to find their way to success in the global marketplace too. These thoughts were running through my mind during the first year college seminar I spoke at last week. I’ve related several of the comments these nineteen-year-old students made and here’s one more:

“I am afraid for the way things will be like when we graduate from college. The workplace will be looking for people who can work really hard. I don’t think we know how to do that.” -Student

These students are hitting the realities of life and expressed a lot of worries. We know that Say Yes to No will equip kids with the self-discipline they need to meet these challenges. The lessons come in small doses, but result in a big payoff.

What lesson do you think your child will learn from No? Please, post a comment and share your thoughts. Thank you.

Word of Say Yes to No spreads quickly, with school and community groups starting book reads all over the state. Here’s what one parent did:

“I attended a Say Yes to No event with Erin Walsh as the speaker. As a result, I am working with our local police chief, the director of our youth probation and our local chemical health initiative group to initiate a Say Yes to No book club through the schools.”  -A parent

One person can have a lot of impact in a community. We’re also spreading the word using the Internet with this blog, eNews, etc. Here’s one website that has picked up on the importance of Say Yes to No for kids: PlayTimePlanIt.com – a website with great things to do with kids in the Twin Cities. Here’s what they say:

 “It seems kids these days are overweight, overindulged and over stimulated. If you have concerns, check out this great campaign based on the book No! Why Kids of All Ages Need to Hear It by local author and child and family advocate, David Walsh.”

They ask for comments. Help spread No – add your comment!

This headline jumped out at me over my morning coffee. My first reaction was, “Great, teachers are supporting elementary school kids.”  But I quickly realized that the headline carried more dire news. The Minnesota State Colleges and Universities system released a study Wednesday stating that 38% of our Minnesota high school graduates had to take at least one remedial course upon entering college – 38%!

This study directly connects with my seminar No conversation with a group of college freshman. Here’s another quote from one of those students: “What you are saying about the impact of behavior on achievement is absolutely correct. I sailed through high school with straight A’s, hardly had any homework. I was one of the “good kids.” I was completely unprepared for college work. My first semester at the U of MN was like getting hit by a truck.”

I get feedback like this wherever I visit. The impact of not teaching our kids the self-discipline they need to be successful reaches from pre-school to college. When teachers have to deal more with student behavior than teaching & parents do not support teachers, the “pact” happens and grades are more indicative of behavior than academic achievement. All kids are impacted – those who do have self-discipline and those who don’t.

Do you agree or disagree?  Please post your comments.

I spoke in a seminar class to a group of nineteen-year-old college freshmen yesterday about brain development and No. The students engaged in the topic immediately and I want to share their responses over the next few blogs because it’s important.

Here’s a quote from one student: “If I talked to my parents the way my 10 year-old-brother talks to my parents, I would have been in my room for hours.”

Teachers, parents, police officers, youth workers, child care providers, etc. across the state and indeed, the country agree that rude and disrespectful behavior is a major issue. It’s the top reason many of our teachers leave the profession after only a few years. Police officers who work with juveniles and in our schools tell me that kids’ behavior has deteriorated quickly in just the last five years. A pre-school child care provider is worried about the rude behavior and language she sees in her young children.

Emotional self-regulation, common courtesy, cooperation, respect, ability to work in groups – these are all skills requiring self-discipline.  Children need to learn how to self-regulate their behavior. Parents are the first and most important teachers. A failure to learn the lessons of No will have ramifications beyond the family and school and into adult friendships and work success.

What No parenting strategy have you tried?  Share your story.

Anyone who has seen the Say Yes to No DVD will remember that Roxanne Battle was an early supporter of the Say Yes to No campaign.  Seven months later Roxanne is more excited than ever because of the response of thousands of parents across Minnesota. As a parent, she knows how such a little word – no – is such a big building block for self-discipline.

Recently Roxanne wrote about the Say Yes to No campaign in her Minnesota Post blog and appeared on KSTP Eyewitness News. If you missed her story you can view the segment (and read her story again) here.

A big thank-you to all who responded to our Say Yes to No survey. Say Yes to No events have spread across Minnesota communities and into other states.  We hope these conversations bring parents, teachers and community members together to discuss how using No will mean success for their kids. As with any movement, we are anxious to hear your stories - stories of your events as well as stories of how using No has impacted you or your community. Thank you to those who have responded.

Here’s an excerpt from one of your stories:

“Before walking out the door to Dr. Walsh's speaking engagement - my 7 year old daughter asked if I was going to that "no talk" she had seen advertised at school; I replied, yes. She responded that I didn't really need to go, because I already said "no" ALL the time already. ….  It was not until I was introduced to Say Yes to NO that I was able to put a reason or name to it like "delayed gratification." I just know that as a child hearing "no" most of the time gave me the internal fortitude to grow up and become a successful person. I always took "no" as a challenge to work harder to earn the "yes"; whether it be saving my money for that one item I didn't get for Christmas or putting myself through college by working full time. …since I was paying for college, I actually went to class, studied and received good grades. …So my resume look pretty good going into early adulthood which allowed me to start at a great company right out of college (when many of my peers were working restaurant jobs for quite awhile - and these were kids whose parents had always said "yes.")

“Even though my husband and I can financially say "yes" all the time, I am hoping that we can find a happy medium so that my children too can take ownership in some of the "things" they save up for and maybe actually appreciate them as well; but more importantly, so that they can become patient, responsible and happy adults!”   - Parent

I talk about restoring the balance in raising our children. Using the parenting tactics that work from No can help restore the balance in our More, Easy, Fast and Fun culture.

Click HERE if you would like to fill out a Say Yes to No survey.