The language we use is so important. Roxanne Battle, one of our early Say Yes to No parent supporters, has reflected on how “no”, such a tiny word, could be so important. However, the word “no” is just the gate-keeper. Other phrases such as “not now,” “wait a while,” “you have a choice,” “later, you can,” or “first we will, then…” are words we can use to teach our children the important character trait of self-discipline and delay of gratification. Using these words will counter the constant media drumbeat that our children hear every day: “Gotta have it.” and “Gotta have it now.”

Other words such as “you really worked hard on that,” “way to stick with it,” “that was hard, but I’m proud that you finished”, or “that didn’t work out, but how could you do it differently?” are phrases that teach another important lesson: perseverance. Our kids need these two important character traits if they are going to be successful and face the challenges they will certainly encounter, not only in school, but in life. Self-discipline and perseverance are critically important, from those first challenges when a child is learning to read to the follow-through they will need later on the job or in the career of their choice.

“No” is such a little word and it is so important.